From the Client’s Mouth: When Feedback Skips the Line — Repairing Cross-Functional Trust
- lou ionis
- Jun 11
- 4 min read
This story comes from a real coaching session. Names and details have been changed to maintain confidentiality.
“Why didn’t they just come to us first?”
That was the question Daniel kept circling back to.
He leads Customer Care in a growing tech company. Recently, Finance escalated a list of performance concerns about his team directly to the SVP instead of first addressing them with Daniel’s manager.
The examples were real. Some mistakes had happened. A few pricing errors had slipped through. There were legitimate process gaps.
But what bothered Daniel most wasn’t the feedback.
It was the path it took.
The Real Problem Wasn’t the Mistakes
In scaling organizations, mistakes happen.
Manual processes introduce risk. Humans forget steps. Systems evolve. Ownership shifts. Nothing about that is unusual.
What is destabilizing is when feedback bypasses the people responsible for fixing it.
Daniel put it plainly:
“You can’t expect someone to fix their mistakes if they’re never given the chance to hear about them.”
When issues escalate upward before being addressed laterally, three things happen:
Trust erodes.
Managers feel blindsided.
Teams feel judged rather than supported.
And once that pattern starts, it compounds.
Why Do People Escalate Instead of Address?
Before reacting, Daniel chose to get curious.
Was this intentional escalation?
Or did it surface casually during another executive conversation?
That distinction matters.
If it was strategic — “I’m going straight to the top” — that signals a relational fracture.
If it was conversational — “We were already discussing another issue and this came up” — that signals process confusion.
Too many leaders assume the worst.
Daniel didn’t.
He understood something critical:
Escalation often reflects a trust gap.
And trust gaps are rarely fixed with confrontation.
They’re fixed with structure and clarity.
The Hidden Cost of Skipped Levels - Broken Trust
When feedback skips a level, it subtly communicates:
“We don’t believe this person will fix it.”
“We don’t trust this manager to handle it.”
“We need executive intervention.”
That perception — even if unspoken — weakens middle leadership.
And middle leadership is where culture is actually lived.
Daniel suspected there may already be a trust gap between Finance and his Customer Care manager.
But he also asked a harder question:
“If they never brought the concerns directly to her, how could she possibly address them?”
This is where many leaders make a mistake.
They defend their people emotionally.
Daniel instead focused on process integrity.
Creating Psychological Safety Across Functions
Cross-functional relationships operate differently than internal team dynamics.
Inside your team, you likely have:
Regular 1:1s
Clear escalation paths
Shared goals
Established trust
Across functions, those rhythms often don’t exist.
So dissatisfaction builds quietly.
It lives in that uncomfortable middle ground:
Not catastrophic enough to demand immediate escalation.
Not comfortable enough to ignore completely.
Unless someone intentionally creates space for feedback, concerns accumulate.
And when they finally surface, they feel explosive.
The Leadership Shift: From Defensive to Structural
Daniel didn’t respond with:
“Why did you go over our heads?”
He responded with:
“Let’s make sure we have the right process so issues get solved quickly and fairly.”
That shift matters.
Instead of personalizing the escalation, he institutionalized the solution.
He proposed:
A shared document tracking every issue raised
Clear ownership for resolution
A monthly cross-functional sync
Defined escalation guidelines
The message was simple:
“We hear you. We’re acting on this. And here’s how we’ll handle concerns moving forward.”
The Confidence Gap Beneath the Surface
During coaching, we explored another possibility:
What if the finance team simply doesn’t trust Daniel’s manager?
Not because of malice.
Not because of incompetence.
But because of perception.
Trust gaps don’t always emerge from major failures.
Sometimes they form from:
Delayed responses
Communication style mismatches
Lack of visibility
Prior unresolved issues
If that’s the case, the solution isn’t just process correction.
It’s confidence rebuilding.
And confidence can’t grow if feedback never reaches the person responsible.
Direct Without Defensive
Daniel described his finance counterpart as direct and no-nonsense.
So his approach mirrors that tone:
Acknowledge the issues.
Validate legitimate concerns.
Clarify process.
Reinforce accountability.
Reset communication pathways.
No blame.
No accusation.
Just clarity.
That’s executive presence.
“We can’t build trust if we don’t let the right people solve the problem.”
And equally important:
“Escalation should be a last step in a clear process — not the first reaction to frustration.”
What This Reveals About Leadership Maturity
The temptation in moments like this is to defend your team.
Or to confront the person who escalated.
Or to downplay the issues.
Daniel chose something harder.
He focused on:
Making stakeholders feel heard
Protecting the dignity of his manager
Reinforcing proper feedback channels
Strengthening cross-functional trust
That combination — empathy + structure — is what separates reactive managers from strategic leaders.
Who This Coaching Is For
This work is for leaders who are:
Navigating cross-functional tension
Managing teams whose work is highly visible
Experiencing escalations that skip levels
Repairing stakeholder trust gaps
Scaling in complexity and influence
If you’ve ever thought:
“Why didn’t they just come to me first?”
This work is for you.
Executive coaching helps you:
Design healthy escalation frameworks
Lead difficult conversations calmly
Build stakeholder confidence
Strengthen middle-manager credibility
Scale trust across departments
The Bigger Leadership Lesson
In growing organizations, mistakes are inevitable.
What defines leadership isn’t the absence of error.
It’s how feedback flows.
If feedback skips structure, trust fractures.
If feedback moves through healthy channels, systems improve.
Daniel isn’t just solving process gaps.
He’s building a culture where people are empowered to fix what’s broken — before it reaches the top.
And that’s leadership at scale.
Ready to Strengthen Cross-Functional Leadership?
If you’re managing stakeholder tension or rebuilding trust across teams:
Because the strongest leaders don’t just fix problems.
They fix the way problems are surfaced.
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